Prepare the Soil

“I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead.” Philippians 3: 10-11

I came out of the Ash Wednesday service with a pensive walk pausing only briefly to greet a couple of the families who had already made their way out. That was as it should be since we were instructed to give thought to who we really are underneath the facade we put up to ourselves and others. We need to consider our nature and what we are at our core that drives the behaviors that give evidence to our sinful selves and not just the acts of sin. While it is good and necessary to confess the acts, we are doomed to repeat these offenses if we don’t dig down to the root of darkness within and remove it.

I looked forward to my short night-ride home; there is something about riding at night for me that I really like. There is a feeling of mystery about it, a heightened awareness of the solitude of the ride and this night I embraced it having some serious thoughts about what is truly separating me from God. There was the anticipation that He would expose it to me, allow me to see the gulf between us, and therefore be able to bring the Holy Spirit to bear on the roots of it to dig it out. That is a scary proposition; make no mistake about it, seeing who we really are and working out the roots of sin is painful and something that is all too easy to run from. Knowing that I’ve only scratched the surface of it doesn’t help getting into it all that much for me. I am thankful for Lent and having the community of believers considering this both as individuals and collectively leading up to our celebration of Christ’s victory over death. I am thankful that during our Ash Wednesday service we were able to hold true to the spirit of it and not put on a happy front just to be upbeat before we left.

Once the source is revealed to me, will I dig it out or attempt to throw dirt back over it to give the appearance that there is nothing there but fertile soil? All too often, I find just the hint of a root and toss a little soil back in place and rake it around making all the right motions of working things out but not truly facing up to it.

We are told that grace awaits the repentant sinner and will be our reward. Faith that this will be so makes it so and this can sustain us during the search. We had best be prepared for the wilderness experience that the season of Lent is patterned after. 40 days; the length of time Jesus spent fasting in the wilderness and then being tempted before entering into His earthly ministry. 40 years; the length of time the Israelites wondered in the wilderness shedding all of the old to enter into the new. The wilderness is parched and barely able to sustain human life; who can survive it? None without the sustenance of grace, the manna of life from the Father.

Somewhere along Montrose Avenue between La Crescenta and Rosemont where the street lights thinned out and traffic fell behind I found something to sustain me. Grace awaits me. The power of His resurrection will get me through the wilderness and effect the change. The power of His resurrection is enough. Death of the sinful self to be resurrected in grace with Him; all that separates us from Christ falls away and we come “to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus our Lord” (Phil. 3: 8) From there we can minister to this earth from a position of fullness and be effective workers of the harvest.