Monday, May 14, 2018

Dear Mothers


I’ve been scrolling through my Facebook news feed and seeing posts about mothers, this being Mother’s Day this is not surprising. I’ve seen posts by mothers with their children, by children with their mothers, husbands to wives, parents to children with children of their own, and a host of other permutations that send the mind reeling and  are too long to type out for fear of not having any room to spare. In short, all my friends have mothers, are mothers, know mothers – ah! There I go again.

Nearly all of the posts are happy and loving. A few are sad, as in, “This is my first Mother’s Day since we lost mom…” and stuff like that. I read these posts and my heart goes out to those in grief and rises in joy with those who celebrate mom both here and gone.

As for me I am fortunate to have my mom (Betty), Stacey (my sister and mother to a niece and three nephews, two of them twins - no little task that, I'll assure you), my mother-in-law (Jan), my wife, and my two daughters (Ashley and Lauren) to celebrate with. To say that I am blessed by these women is to give new depth to the notion of blessings. And get this; my daughter-in-law Ani will soon join this all-star list of mothers I get to celebrate. They are fantastic, each and every one.

I’ve been around for a while and I have one or two ‘Old Guy’ shirts to prove it. One of the great bonuses of having coached girls’ sports and doing youth ministry for years is that I’ve ‘adopted’ bonus daughters – friends of my own kids, players on the teams I coached, and amazing young girls/ladies that came through the youth programs I was involved with. I’m talking about more than 45 years’ worth of women, a couple of generations’ worth.

Let’s start with La Crescenta Church of the Living word where Cindy and I were ‘youth pastors’. My friends on Facebook include re-connections with Dayna, Michelle, Kristi, Sheri, Tomi, and Sammy, to name a few. I see their loving posts, talk to them about the amazingness of parenthood, and see photos that can’t be photo-shopped to create the genuineness of their love for their kids. And this group? Some of them are enjoying grand-motherhood. See, I told you I was an old guy. They are an amazing bunch.

My bonus daughters come from friends of my kids and through my association with them at LCPC that I’d take in at the drop of a hat. And notable children of friends, (Christen). They are becoming parental units in at a dizzying rate. Kayla, Whitney, Caroline, Jennie (yes, I count wives of directors), Sarah, Renee, and Lauren. It is astounding to me how well this bunch loves their kids but it shouldn’t really, they have mothers who led the way and set the bar high.

Mothers of the caliber I’m talking about here are heroes to me. I have a few categories of people I consider heroes and one of the categories closest to my heart are the single mothers I’ve known, watched, prayed for/with, and agonized over. I’ve know these women through work, sports, and church and each one has rocked motherhood to the max. I’m thinking of Jane, Doreen, Cheryl, Betty, and Laurie, to be specific. Betty is my Harley riding great-grandmother Living Word friend. If you read that, you know she’s amazing. Laurie is special almost beyond description but I’ll try anyway. She was part of the group on my first MAZ trip that effected a spiritual healing for me I desperately needed. Later, we coached together and out that I ended up with Kayla as bonus daughter and best of friends to my daughter Lauren - both those young ladies are taking motherhood by storm.

These single moms have raised excellent daughters on their own while earning a living, supporting the household, getting their kids everywhere they needed to be, and still, they took time to help still others. My list above include a couple who took a level of responsibility that is way above the call of duty; for one reason or another they were the primary adult in the lives of granddaughters. Amazed? You should be.

Now, I know I’ve left some names out this account but I remind you of this, I’m an old guy and that’s bound to happen. If you’re a mother who’ve loved your kids and sacrificed on their behalf then you should pat yourself on the back whether you’re listed here or not. You deserve it and I applaud you. Thank you for contributing to the hope of the world.

I would be remiss if I didn’t cover a category of motherhood that is not easy to deal with as the definition is a little nebulous; spiritual mothers. They are few and far between and many of our female friends in our walks of faith fall more into the category of spiritual sisters. We’ll be lucky to have one in our whole life. My earthly mother transcends the line and has been both to me. Lois Machal has been my spiritual mother; looking after me, coaching, praying, and even pushing me. She and my mom were there during that critical time all believers have as we are coming into our own walks of faith.

One last thing, and let me be unequivocal about it, I unashamedly put my mom on the top of my list of heroes. 

Hug your mom and tell her you love her.

jerry