Treasured Silence

    The character that I am writing has undertaken a study of the discipline of solitude and is using Foster’s Celebration of Discipline, The Path to Spiritual Growth as his primary source. Well, whatever my character studies, so must I. In a subsection titled “The Sacrifice of Fools” Foster is dealing with silence and the pain that the lack of it can bring when silence is really preferred. He has used a quote on the subject from John Woolman’s Journal that I feel is most poignant to me at the moment since I am now beginning a new term on Session. Please allow me to share the quote and my thoughts. It is a bit lengthy so I’ll break it up a bit as I comment.

     “I went to meetings in an awful frame of mind, and endeavored to be inwardly acquainted with the language of the true Shepherd. One day, being under a strong exercise of spirit, I stood up and said some words in a meeting; but not keeping close to the Divine opening, I said more than was required of me. Being soon sensible of my error, I was afflicted in mind some weeks, without any light or comfort, even to that degree that I could not take satisfaction in anything.”

     I have endeavored over my career at AT&T as well as in meetings of service, both in the church and in other volunteer settings, to say only what needs to be said and to be quiet if everything that needs to be said is being said. I prefer to speak up only when pertinent points of view are being expressed but not really heard or if what I believe is the correct course of action is not being expressed at all. I frequently fall short of this goal and as Brother Woolman has expressed here, I’ve said more than was needed at the time.

     I have felt bad about it but probably not to the depth Woolman shares with us in his journal. Like him, I seek forgiveness for speaking out of turn and off point, especially when my words distract from the purpose of the meeting and lead to a waste of time, or worse yet as in church meetings where this can be hurtful to others as well as harmful to God’s purpose. Woolman’s quote continues and brings me a measure of hope.

“I remembered God, and was troubled, and in the depth of my distress he had pity upon me, and sent the Comforter. I then felt forgiveness for my offence; my mind became calm and quiet, and I was truly thankful to my gracious Redeemer for his mercies.”

     I think that the pathway to a Holy Silence leads us to a better understanding of God’s Will in things - our life and the life of the church as well as what we seek for our communities at large. The remainder of Brother Woolman’s quote tells us what the benefits of Devine Silence can bring.

“About six weeks after this, feeling the spring of Divine love opened, and a concern to speak, I said a few words in a meeting, in which I found peace. Being thus humbled and disciplined under the cross, my understanding became more strengthened to distinguish the pure spirit which inwardly move upon the heart, and which taught me to wait in silence sometimes many weeks together, until I felt that rise which prepares the creature to stand like a trumpet, through which the Lord speaks to his flock.”

     If I’m in a meeting and you think that I’m being silent, I hope that it is because everything that I think needs to be said and heard is being said and heard. Likewise, if I’m speaking, let’s pray that it is because I have something meaningful to say and that it should be something we need to hear.

In His grip, jerry