Any Questions?

Every once in a while I wonder what questions I would ask Jesus when I find myself in His presence, as if I would have the capacity. I rather imagine that I’ll be prostrated at His feet curious as to why I’m there and to what purpose I’d been called – is this my final call and what list of charges will I be hearing at my sentencing? You know, hearing all those things I’d done that I can’t imagine Christ forgiving me for?

Still, I think about what I would ask Jesus given the chance to speak in His presence. Years ago I lost one of my best of friends to some drunk driver. The circumstances of his death baffled me. He was the only passenger of five in his car that died and the only one in it not to have a broken bone in his body. I told myself that the first thing I would ask God is why Doug had to die so young and so needlessly. Doug is the first person I led to Christ and it just didn’t seem right for him to be gone so soon after. I held on to that question in anger and anguish so tightly that it became a bitterness that divided me from my Savior. It took the prayers and laying on of hands of a bunch of junior high kids and their adult leaders to heal me of that bitterness more than 20 years after Doug was killed.

What questions do you have? I imagine they are similar to my old question – Why was this or that person taken from me? – Why was I mistreated at the hands of someone I loved and trusted? – Why do good people suffer at the hands of the evil? – Why did my friend lose all hope? - Why was my prayer unanswered and that person not healed? – and so on. I’ve had the question I talked about, all these, and more. I’m not sure I’m strong enough or wise enough to hear the answers.

Questions of faith and doctrine might rest on our hearts but I think those will fade at the sight of His glory and their importance to us vanish.

I believe it is okay to harbor questions for Jesus. Just don’t do it in anger, anger begets bitterness, bitterness separation. (The same can be said of anger toward people) Our separation from God is the very reason Jesus went to the cross and suffered on our behalf. His suffering closes the gap we’ve built, His resurrection is power enough to make mute all of the questions. Don’t hold on to your anger at unanswered questions so tightly you can’t grip the Lord’s hand when it is offered. Even when you do hold too tight, some friend, an acquaintance, a random stranger, or a group of wacky teenagers will come along and do you a kindness that loosens your grip on bitterness and allows you to breathe again. I pray that it to be so for you.

If you need to hold on to a question do so in anguish. Jesus understands anguish better and more thoroughly than anyone can imagine. It was He who said on the cross, “Father, why hast thou forsaken me?” Even though Christ knew the answer He asked it in His darkest hour. In the Lord’s deep understanding of your anguish you will be comforted.

What questions do you have for God? Ponder them for a bit, let the ones go that are too troublesome to your walk with Him, and hold lightly those you have in anguish. Peace.

In His grip,

jerry