I called to her, as I have been for weeks now. Finally, she turned to me, the smile on her lips giving her careworn face a lift I hadn’t seen since she last talked to her great-grands. She handed me a wallet card she was holding in her hand. Nothing fancy, muted blues and reds printed on a beige card that read in eighteen-point Times New Roman font “Drafted” across the top.
A message followed in twelve-point Freestyle Script, “Your services are required in the Heavenly Host. Please report at once.”
In the lower right corner in the tiniest of prints possible to read was the signature, “Jesus Christ, Lord and Savior”.
As small as it was, the signature brought a burning to my eyes and as simple as the card was, it broke my heart.
How could I beg her to stay when the servant at her core commanded that she obey the God she had served for at least my lifetime? A lifetime of devotion required one last act of service above and beyond her will to stay and love her kids, laugh with her grandchildren, or teach her great-grands. And so she went quietly and finally without the struggle that so defined the final years of her devotion to her husband.
Aside from being my biggest fan and encourager, I remember mom as being a model of devotion – as a mother, a pre-school teacher, youth advisor, Stephen Minister, Elder, Deacon, bonus mom to many, sister to many more… When you were with her she was devoted to being with you and being whatever it was you needed at the time.
I would really like to know what is behind the door and within the misty room she walked into. I want to know what critical service she is being called to, away from me. Selfish, I know. I suspect a portion of her service will be like that of her father before her, looking over my shoulder and from time to time giving me a nudge.
Mom does nudging well. It is because of her that I started this blog, Calvary’s Thread. I had just put up my second post in Iron Side Up, it was about some Christian mussing or comment of some sort while riding my bike. She said, “You should have a blog just for this kind of stuff.” I had to do what she said, she is my mom after all.
I imagine that after she handed over the card to the gatekeeper, she was ushered into a big hall and greeted by the One Who Invited her, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” And then there was a reunion – Aunt Jean (Mom’s oldest and closest friend), Carol and the other cohorts who started the Center For Children, my dad, her parents, brothers, and sisters. A bunch from the Heavenly Hall of Fame showed her around, there was singing, worship, incense, and an awesome silence filled with love and warmth.
I can live with this vision of her.
jerry
Stupid Facebook, cropped out the best part of the photo of mom, her face.
ReplyDeleteFacebook comment from Leslie Lyons Le Cheminant: Jerry this tribute you wrote is very touching and very heartfelt. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. 💗
ReplyDeleteThank you Leslie. Sharing from the heart is not always pretty for me but is the most effective and real form of writing I can do. It cleanses the soul for me...
DeleteFacebook reply from Leslie Lyons Le Cheminant: Jerry White me too 😎
DeleteFacebook comment from Steve Kuhn: She was my youth advisor, boss at CFC, and bonus mom. I loved your Mom with all of my MUCK heart.
ReplyDeleteThanks for posting the full photo Steve. This one we found while going through the years and years of memory books. It is a photo from a MUCK Snow Camp and happy and joy-filled look she has is priceless.
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ReplyDeleteFacebook comment from Ann Marie Laye: Beautiful , comforting thoughts. Love the smiling picture as well; not one I have seen before. ❤️ My inspirational Aunt Betty was devoted to keeping us in the loop of this family, even after our father ( her brother ) passed on at a very young age. I will always be grateful for this, and the times we had together.
ReplyDeleteThat smile on her faced is one of the best, pure joy at what she was doing on a snow camp with a bunch of junior high kids. I am thankful mom kept us in touch through the years and our times together as a big family are the sweetest of memories.
DeleteFacebook comment from Jennifer Craw Uresti: So beautiful to think of her “Drafted” card. Such a perfect description. She is surely a Hall of Famer in heaven.
ReplyDeleteI loved how at ease she always made me feel. I had the great fortune to get to spend a few weeks down South with her and with you, when I was young. She took me on a ride in the Fiat down to Catalina Island, what a thrill that was. The top down, wind in our hair, then to ride in a Fairy boat while sitting in the car! Such a wonderful experience.
She was genuinely happy that I was so excited to be getting all of those experiences.
She was a gem of a woman. I will carry a piece of her with me always.
Love you all.
Jennifer
Your comment here captures a bunch of things mom loved doing. Driving with the top down, being at the island, experiencing things with her family. Gem is an great way of thinking about her. Love you cousin.
DeleteFacebook comment from Evan O'Meara: Jerry, thank you for this touching and thoughtful gift to us and your Mother. It is a testament to your Mother but speaks to me about my own as well.
ReplyDeleteExcellent mothers are theme many of us share and it is encouraging that that I've written something that speaks to others is touching ways. Betty J White was a big fan of our men's group and loves that you guys are in my life. Thanks Evan.
DeleteFacebook reply from Evan O'Meara: ♥️🙏
DeleteFacebook comment from Shirley Cummings McClelland: Thank you for sharing!
ReplyDeleteFacebook comment from Stacey White Horst: No one says it like you do, Jer.
ReplyDeleteThanks sis. If I wrote like others they'd likely sue me for plagiarism. I on the other hand would stick to the high road and think if a compliment if others said like I do. ;-) This one wasn't easy, it came in a short, sharp, jab of a punch in the wee hours of the morning.
DeleteFacebook comment from Robyn Denham: Aunt Bets was like no other. She could make my mom laugh until she nearly passed out. Her warm caring was a gift in itself. She always found a way to come for important events in our lives, often traveling quite a distance. The best thing was whenever I saw her and looked into her wonderful face, I knew for certain how very much I was loved.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this Robyn. When our moms got together it was a two way street full of loving and laughing. It is infectious just thinking about them with each other.
DeleteAnd when mom was with somebody she was with them, tuned to their needs and emotional states. It was quite a gift.
Facebook reply to Robyn from Denise White Caldwell: Bob got to meet Aunt Jean on her last visit to Oregon. Mom and Jean went to the river to soak up the sun all day and came home laughing. Bob knew right away Jean was special in Mom's life.
DeleteFacebook comment from Lori Morrison O'Connor: She was one of my youth advisors, LCPC Center for Children’s boss, softball teammate, a colleague with my mom at Center for Children, role model, and friend 💕.
ReplyDeleteShe loved doing all of those things for the kids she served and the people she served with. Thank you for being a teammate to my mom.
DeleteFacebook comment from Laurie Kuhn McDonald: Beautiful words, Jerry. BJW was one in a million 💗💗💗
ReplyDeleteThanks Laurie. She was indeed one in a million. And boy did my folks love your folks. The cards my mom saved were peppered with ones from you guys. And my dad printed out his emails and saved them in a notebook - a great number of them jokes from your dad. I have been so thankful they kept in touch over the years. A good accurate number would be four in a million...
DeleteFacebook comment from Jeannie Jennings: I don’t even know where to begin.
ReplyDeleteIt has been hard to figure that out for myself until this post. And now I don't know where to turn next or where to stop. Perhaps I won't.
DeleteFacebook comment from Lisa Brickner: Your expression of your mom's entrance into eternal Grace is precious.
ReplyDeleteBetty was a cornerstone and a pillar in LCPC church life. She expressed the love of Christ in all roles she lived out there. She was a Center for Children co-worker and senior high leader with my mom. She was my boss while working at Center for Children, and a softball teammate at LCPC.
Betty White was ... beyond words ...So amazing!!!
I can only imagine how much your family must miss her. What an imprint she left on SO many lives. She was a beautiful expression of Grace lived out in person.
Facebook comment from Lisa Burruso-Hutchinson: She was my youth advisor, my boss,my mentor and my friend. I miss her and all her Facebook comments too!💝
ReplyDeleteI am being amazed by the number of comments on this post where mom was several things to individuals. I think she took the "all things to all people" to heart.
DeleteAnd regarding Facebook, she was prolific and unafraid to call me out on things. When I would put something kind of undefined she would give me the 'ugh?' or 'what are you talking about?' My motorcycle friends were amazed at her liking and commenting on posts they put up on my wall or comments they made. We all wish they could have met her.
She was all those things to me as well and I miss her terribly.
Facebook comment from Demaris Brown: Because of the current phase in my life I have been thinking a lot about Aunt Betty as a care giver. My first recollection of her in this mode was when Great-grandma lived with her and I came to visit. She was calm, attentive, and present. I came to help to give a break and I left there learning a lot about being that kind of a person. Then as she cared for Uncle Russ through the years she was still that attentive, present and caring person. As I have wondered how she maintained that I realized that she took time for herself mentally and physically and also she knew she was not perfect in many ways. I am currently working very hard to walk in her foot steps and be mindful of her example. You cannot be perfect in any of it but you can learn from your mistakes and try and do better in the next setting. What I wouldn’t give to ask her some questions now about life moving forward. I take solace in the fact what she has told me and showed me can now be but into action.
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone on this leg of your journey. I think mom realized that as well as anyone I've known. I think it is okay to ask her the questions and you might be surprised to see where the answers come from. Each morning brings a new opportunity to succeed, learn, and move ahead. You are up to the task, you with your circle of support.
DeleteFacebook comment from Karen Drake: Thank you for sharing as I know this came from your heart about your wonderful mom. So much love! It’s a beautiful tribute.
ReplyDeleteThank you Karen. The writing from my heart is the most effective by a long shot and the most gratifying form for me and it carries the deepest of healing. It is all the more satisfying when someone such as you reads and recognizes it as a missive from the heart. Thank you again.
DeleteThere is a well-worn phrase people use in writing shops and conferences, "Write what you know." A couple of years ago I attended a workshop where the speaker put a twist on it, "Write what you love." Soon, I will be able to both together...
Facebook comment from Jim McClelland: The unstoppable power of Grace that your mom had a never ending supply of. We know from Whom it comes. All of a sudden that loaves and fishes event becomes the most relevant aspect of the Gospel.
ReplyDeleteYou won’t be able to stop. Grace has no brakes.
Brother Jim, you've touched on an aspect of this amazing ride we have been on that I have tried to wrap my arms around. The fact that this has been more like "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride" than any other I've taken has been a test.
DeleteIt has been that Grace our moms knew was theirs carried them through every twist and turn. These women were like your GGR Driving Instructors taking us along the track, into and out of every turn all the while teaching us Grace.
An amazing thing about this Grace with no brakes is that, powered by His resurrection as it is, no ess-turn life throws at us can take us off-track so long as we cling to that grace. Betty Andretti knew this well.
Let's keep it between the fences and we will be just fine.
Facebook comment from Lauren Chambers: Finally had the courage to read this ♥️ tomorrow is going to be another hard day
ReplyDeleteToo right Baby Girl. Another hard day after a hard day. All day yesterday I had my age-old argument with myself, "Do I call mom today for New Year's and tomorrow for her birthday? Oh crap..." "I better call today so I can wish dad a Happy New Year. Aw shit..." Yup, it will be like that on and off for a while I suppose. I love you...
DeleteFacebook comment from Dana Fritzler: Sending you all love
ReplyDeleteThanks Dana. We'll take it, add a little of our own, and send it back at you.
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