I need to preface this post, or my ramblings on entitlement, with
a disclaimer of sorts. I’m an old telephone man, one who failed as a gym
teacher, no less. So, if in reading this you find a nugget that weighs out as a
truth that you can cash in, thank God. Also, this post was inspired by a
Facebook question posed by Elisabeth Kennedy and the wonderful replies she has
received by her considerable community. For them all, I thank God.
The question is, “What do you think creates entitlement – in a
child, or a culture? And how does one work to change it once it has reared its
ugly head?”
Entitlement as defined by Merriam-Webster is “- the condition of
having a right to have, do, or get something or the feeling or belief that you
deserve to be given something (such as special privileges)” Without defining ‘sense’
of entitlement, my friends have addressed the meaning in their second
definition. My Urban Dictionary app, as it likes to, gets into more politically
incorrect usages. However, the UD opens with a sentence that I found useful in
my consideration on the topic. Sense of entitlement is “the idea that one has a
right to be given something which others believe should be obtained through effort.”
I frequently feel better when
I’ve mulled over the key definitions when I approach subjects of this nature. Now, to the question at hand I have to turn to
Genesis 3 where mankind’s flawed nature is exploited by the serpent. We were
born with the capacity to have a sense of entitlement and the serpent exploits
that sense in us and uses many guises to do so because the serpent seeks to
separate us from God. We are kept at arm’s length from our Lord as soon as we
feel entitled to God’s presence in our lives and to any of the promises He
offers. If we want His presence and believe we need it, yes. Believe we deserve
it? Not so much.
That’s all well and good for spiritual things but how do we apply
this to the practical life of raising kids or leading churches, countries, or
cultures? Good grief! God has been wrestling with us forever on that and He
doesn’t have to deal with entitlement within Himself. God freed his people and
Moses dealt with the grumbling to the point of exasperation whereupon he struck the
rock to shut them up. How many of us have capitulated to our children’s cries
for something and shoved the coveted item into their hands while growling out, “Here!
Now leave me alone.”? It is no easy task to instill a sense of appreciation and
a capacity for being thankful for what we have when we ourselves struggle with the
disorder.
We need to apply a firm but loving hand in the teachable moments
with our children in order to foster a sense of appreciation for the things
they have instead of a sense of disappointment for the things they want but don’t
have. Likewise, when we are responsible for churches or segments of churches,
countries, or cultures, we need to use a steady approach to instill the sense
of thankfulness over entitlement. And in the end? We hand it back to God to
bear fruit.
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| Used from my GraphicStock account. * |
If anyone is entitled to anything, everything, it is Jesus. Paul
tells us of Jesus’ heart in Philippians 2: 5-8 (NIV): “5In
your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: 6Who,
being in very nature God, did not
consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 7rather,
he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human
likeness. 8And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled
himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross!”
A sense of entitlement is the absence of humility. The Great
Teacher explained things to that point in the beatitudes, two of his first
three deal with humility and their rewards:
Matthew 5: 1-3 (NIV) “1Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a
mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2and he began to teach
them, saying: 3Blessed
are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 4Blessed
are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. 5Blessed are the
meek, for they will inherit the earth.”
So, we must realize that we are born with the capacity to have a
sense of entitlement and then use teachable moments with those for whom we are
responsible and demonstrate humility and thankfulness and expect the same in
return. Pray for patience. Pray for humility. Pray for discernment, wisdom, and
unflinching love. By all means, pray.
In His grip, jerry
*Regarding my graphic search in GraphicStock, I found nothing when
using the terms entitlement. A photo of someone doing a selfie came up for
selfishness. However, when I used ‘humility’ as my search term all of the
graphics that came up had the cross, Jesus, or both and many of them referred
to Good Friday within the text of the graphic.
